Is Conflict the Same as Bullying?

Posted January 13, 2019

People may sometimes confuse conflict with bullying, but they are different. Conflict occurs between two or more people who have a disagreement, a difference of opinion or different views.  Conflict between students does not always mean its bullying.

Children learn at a young age to understand that others can have a different perspective than their own, but developing the ability to gain perspective takes time and the process continues into early adulthood. In conflict, each person feels comfortable expressing his or her views, and there is no power imbalance.  Each person feels able to state his or her viewpoint. How people deal with conflict can make it positive or negative.

Conflict becomes negative when an individual behaves aggressively by saying or doing hurtful things. Then the conflict is an aggressive interaction. Conflict only becomes bullying when it is repeated over and over again and there is a power imbalance.  Over time, a pattern of behaviour may emerge where the person who behaves aggressively in the conflict may continue or even make it worse.  The person who is the recipient of the aggressive conflict may feel less and less able to express his or her point of view and feel more and more powerless.  That is when negative conflict may turn into bullying.

A school will respond to bullying and conflict differently.  For example, in the case of a conflict, a school staff member may try to have the students come together to tell their side of the story and help them resolve the situation together.  In the case of bullying, a principal will consider progressive discipline, which may include suspension or expulsion.

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